End of Junior Year

WOW! I haven’t been on here since forever.
Well, junior year has officially ended today at 12:35PM. All I can say about junior year is that it is…without fault one of the most stressful years of my education career. I’ve never been so stressed out before until this year. I ended up with a high grade point average compared to possibly the entire school but I was honestly not satisfied with my performance. Actually, I am not satisfied with the reflections of my hard work. I’ve dedicated my butt off for every class to receive 87%, 88%, and an 89% in three of my classes. My teachers don’t “bump” up grades so in my head all that ran through my mind was “I didn’t put in enough time, I didn’t try hard enough, I was being a slacker, I have failed.” That’s not true. I’ve put in MORE than enough time, I’ve given every test, quiz, and project my 101%, I am known for getting my work done on time, and I did not fail. I did my best and that is all I can exert. My grades and GPA may not reflect my efforts and dedication but I know deep down inside I deserve more than a number or letter to define me. I am more than any grade point average. I’ve put in so much to deserve more and the grade is never an accurate depiction of my efforts. I’ve learned that life is sometimes so unfair, but in the end, I’ll make it out alive and I will end up going to college. I will make it through. I’m glad this year is over though. Time to put it all in the past and just move on with life.
I went home from school, crying because it was so heartbreaking to see how my grades were not an accurate depiction of my habits. I cried and cried and cried for two hours and went through a mild panic attack. Only after my boyfriend came over did I try to get back to reality and think rationally. Then we went to the beach to think things through and to just get some fresh air. I got home and went to the gym for around an hour and a half. Now I’m here, writing to you about junior year.
It was hell, but it has taught me a valuable lesson.
All I can do now is move on…

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